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Brownbird

Brownbird Variant names:
Brown-headed Brownbird, Brown-rumped Brownbird, Brown-winged Brownbird, Brown-thighed Brownbird

Scientific name:
Clevelandius Brownii

Distinguishing characteristics:
Brownish feathers; even uglier than Graybird; poop tastes like chicken.

Song:
Phhht, phht

Fun facts:

  • Large, scary Brownbirds are sometimes called "owls." These owls are often portrayed as wise, intelligent birds. This is not true, of course. Many have problems with the most basic math problems, few read above a third-grade level, and one particularly dense Brownbird tested with an IQ lower than the mean IQ of the current presidental administration's cabinet officers.
  • The slangy euphemisms "to make a Brownbird" and "stinks like a Brownbird" are seldom used in polite conversation.
 

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